If you’ve ever been stuck at a table next to a die-hard vegan who thinks bees are forced labor and they should sue the human race for honey theft, bee movie style? I know I have!   Well this oughta help you deal with it.

This is a real heated internal debate among vegans: they don’t want animals to be harmed yet honey is delicious.  What do you do?  So you’ve got some vegans that will justify eating it and some that think in order to consider yourself a real actual human being you can’t be OK with harm coming to any animal, including insects.

Let me ask you vegans: do you have pets, and do you give your pet flea baths, flea collars, flea drops, tick shampoo or deworming medicine?  If you do, then you’re harming animals by your logic.  “Oh bees are different” you say, “bees are nice”… They’re cute like in the movie.  No they’re not; they’ll just as soon sting you as look at you.

Is a bee to be treated differently than a flea?  Because the flea causes harm and a bee doesn’t   I think anyone who’s been stung will beg to differ… But does the bee have more feelings or deserve more respect than a termite?  Do vegans just let the termites devour and destroy their homes?  I think not.  Don’t make a blanket statement unless you can really follow through with it guys…

And if you want to save something, save the people and the planet we live on – a diet that consumes some animals uses less land than a diet that is strictly plant based… that’s right, you have got to sort out your priorities:

And do vegans have dogs?  And do they give their dogs only a vegan diet?  Because you’re sparing the animal that gets used for their food but that’s cruel and unnatural to the dog.  You can’t win!  Dogs are not vegetarians to any degree and they don’t thrive well that way.  They have sharp teeth because their natural prey is animals- yes; we’re gonna go there, I know it’s cliché but we’re still gonna do it.

We thrive best on a diet that includes all forms of nutrition-including animals.  Yes, I know that you vegans say, your diet is just a choice to be sensitive to the needs of all living things and blah blah blah… pleh! Making your own choice is fine! I’m fine with it. I encourage it. I’ll buy you vegan chocolates on Valentine’s Day!  But don’t try to force influence on other people.  You don’t like it when I say your decision is stupid, do you?  Well, neither do we, the average Joes.

You say we’re cruel for taking advantage of these cute little helpless hapless bees who can’t defend themselves.  Well, if you really wanna help the poor little exploited bees, you’re gonna have to break one of your own rules and genetically modify them with bigger stingers.  Because unless they suddenly develop the ability to be cute and reasonable, we’re gonna do to their little invertebrate exoskeleton tushies what we do to everything else:  use ‘em, overwork ‘em, breed them to work even harder so we can overwork them more, and then eventually turn them into zombies that take over the world and bring about the apocalypse in the next Will Smith movie.

-Claire Kats

Read more about Vegans and Bees

The Great Honey Debate
Why Vegans Cannot Decide Whether to Eat Honey

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